I painted my nails yesterday. It was an awkward, non relaxing painting of the nail session in which the lady baby had just falling asleep (which typically last a swift 5-10 minutes or so), my middle was playing a sight word game on the IPad and sir cam was somewhere hanging with his dad (as usual). I was able to successfully polish on two coats with a full dry in between before my little girls eyes popped wide open and she let out a few cries that it was time to be held. It was an awkward, non relaxing painting of the nail session, but it was done nonetheless. A pretty Scarlett Essie red "a list". Made me feel something like a fancy mommy during the lady's next diaper change.
Today, just one day later, my nails have already chipped in at least five different spaces. I used to think that it was this very reason that made painting my nails not worth the 5-10 of my time. Everyday is a battle to reclaim the worth and importance of my job as a wife and a mom. I have dreams and ambitions that I know are only delayed and not denied. I'm aware that this is exactly where I'm supposed to be. I understand that underneath all the throw up and the dirty diapers there's a fancy title and a shiny crystal award waiting for me at the end of everyday. My prayer is that HE help me make this "life" a little prettier. Having glossy painted nails, delightfully scented candles to burn, pretty pots to cook my family dinners with and fancy tupperware to pack lunches and snacks in make this important job of mine seem all the more dreamy.
Today was a good day. And every thought that I had today that told me it wasn't, told me I didn't accomplish anything, told me I should have been doing something more important, or that I could have done so much better... I choose to write them off as lies.
Time for me to unwind and get ready for tomorrow. Because I'm expecting something even better, even prettier, even sweeter than the day before.
From Syreena, With Love